Hello! How are you doing up there in Vancouver? I address you in this public forum because there is something I need from you, and it is something only a person in your unique position can give me. My need for this thing is great -- but alas, given my current position, I am unable to obtain it. Perhaps, given that I've now made it a matter of public record, you can find it in your extremely large and ever-bursting-with-generosity heart to grant me this one wish, this one pleading.
What is this thing for which I beg?