Wednesday, November 12, 2008

A brief discussion about genetics

Consider, if you will, the genetic factors behind the curious Munster family.

Grandpa Munster and Lily Munster are, quite clearly, Vampires or, as they're popularly known, "Draculas." This means that they're dead people who have been reanimated by whatever spiritual or supernatural force creates Draculas; however, they have, oddly, retained their ability to reproduce -- Lily is clearly Grandpa's offspring, though it is unclear who the mother is. Herman Munster, however, is clearly a monster, or as they're popularly known, "Frankensteins." He, too, is a reanimated corpse, though presumably through the means of electrical infusion of the tissues via some unnamed evil scientist. He, too, retains the ability to produce sperm.

Where the confusion comes in is with the offspring, Eddie and Marilyn. Now, Eddie is clearly an aberration like his parents -- however, he is a werewolf or, as they're popularly known, a "Woofman." Marilyn is quite clearly a normal human girl -- she retains none of the characteristics of her mother's side. What does this say about the crossbreeding between a vampire and a reanimated corpse?

Clearly the wild card here is Lily's mother. Draculaism must not be a dominant gene -- one presumes that Lily's mother was part Dracula and part Woofman and through breeding with a Frankenstein -- simply a reanimated corpse, but basically a normal human, one assumes, BEFORE the reanimation -- the Dracula gene became recessive and the Woofman gene and human gene became dominant. One shudders to think of a Dracula with the lycanthropic tendency -- the thirst for human blood must have made euthanasia essential. Grandpa presumably killed her for her own good, and it is this sorrow which informs him in his daily life.

I would seriously advise Marilyn -- who can "pass" as human -- to notify any potential breeding partners that she has the capability of producing Dracula or Woofman offspring, in case he's not aware of her forebears prior to breeding.

Our next discussion: the Addams Family -- clearly a case of nuclear mutation gone haywire.


Tilt Araiza said...

Wasn't Marylin Lily and Herman's niece rather than their daughter?

Jon Hunt said...

Even stranger -- presumably Herman's brother or sister's kid before he died?

MissTrixi said...

OK - this is my attempt to explain...

Lilly was spawned before grandpa became a vampire. Vampires don't age, so he became one late in life...then bit his daughter - the sicko!

Lilly may have birthed Eddie before this happened too, so he was born a human to a human. Then he was bitten by a wolfperson.

Here's where I'm reeeeaally stretching it...

Lilly's true love was the human brain doner for Herman. They had a child together before he died. When he died, her devistating heartbreak forced Grandpa to reanimate a being using Hermans brain (Grandpa liked to experiment - remember his lab in the basement?). Herman is a bit addled because his brain was dead tissue ranimated, but Lilly still clings to the man she loved in human form. Then Eddie was bitten by a warewolf!

Marylin was sent to the only 'living' family that were left after her parents passed. She came from normal people, but they keep saying she's the defective one to humor Eddies young ego.

What dya think?


ashley said...

I think you nailed it Trix! At least, that's what always kind of made sense to me.

It's a huge relief knowing that I'm not the only person in the world who worries about these things.

belsum said...

That is indeed some first class fanwankery there trix. Nice.

MissTrixi said...

Hee Hee....thanks ladies :-D


LAP said...

I like to blame the whole crazy Munster family on Granpa actually- if there was a werewolf around to bite Eddie? Grandpa's fault. Lily's husband died and had to be reanimated? Have Grandpa do it since it was his fault!

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